A New Feel

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I didn’t love you, not at first. I couldn’t let myself become fragile to you.

I’m all things strong, I love with control. I refused to let myself lose control with you.

My feet stay on the ground, my head remains steady. I refused to let myself 
lose control with you. 

Feelings come and go, I keep mine at bay. With you, I refused to let them be free, the feelings for you I refused to let them stay.

I’m not vulnerable, I’m not affectionate, I’m not sensitive, I’m not careless but careful. I told you, I love with control.

So why am I losing it? 

Why do I feel like the road is icy making me slip with every step?

More importantly, why do you keep catching me? 

I never fall around you, I only slip, never hurting myself but finding more of myself.

And it’s always around you. 

I adore how you hold me, a way like never before. A warm and tight embrace, one that I once feared.

There’s something in the way you kiss that I thought was poison. It didn’t kill me, instead it healed me. 

You bypassed the walls I built so high and strong. You didn’t break them. You held my hand and helped me take them down. Brick by brick.

I crave you. 

The feeling you leave when you touch my skin, it’s electric. When your eyes fixate on mine I drown. I see your secrets, your stories, your feelings and emotions but you read mine.
And I let you.

You have a hold on me. I like it. With everything you do you captivate me, with every word you say it wakes me up. I don’t know how you did it, with you I feel new.

My fears, my worries, my doubts, my issues, you took them all and see me free. My mind is free.

Slowly but surely you made me lose control. For the first time, I’m falling but I know you’ll catch me. 

I’m not scared anymore, 

I love you.

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